Posts Tagged ‘Hope’

I was flipping through the tv guide the other day when I came across the show Wife Swap. This is a reality show I tend to skip over as every time I have attempted to watch it the negative energy coming off of the screen just forces me to walk away, but I am not sure what captured my attention this particular time…maybe a word flashed that caught my imagination or maybe I was hallucinating, but I flicked to the info of the episode and found it really appealed to my state of mind. The description of the episode was something like:

“A well off lady who believes in the power of positive thinking and self manifestation swaps place with a down on her luck woman who’s husband is currently unemployed and whom lives in a trailer.”

Positive thinking – check

Self manifestation – check

This one sounded like it might be a really good watch. So I dedicated an hour of my life to see what it may reveal and how this wonderful positive thinking would greatly influence and hopefully help improve the outlook of the other lady’s family. Oh just how sadly wrong I was…..*cue the usual negativity that ensues in this program*

Of course, when the wives enter their “new homes” the husbands find it difficult to deal with the new women that they are living with and some quite amazing discussions and reactions ensue. There are so many thoughts and emotions I experienced while watching this program that I cannot explain them all, so I’m going to try and touch upon what I feel are the most important ones for me:

  • It is much easier to think positively about a situation when things are going well for you personally, it is much harder when you are personally going through tough times. Example, I find it a lot of fun to *try* and live as frugally as possible, but I have the luxury of knowing if it doesn’t work out I can spend more because the money is there. I *know* that if we had to be frugal simply because there was no other option, it would not feel like such a positive experience.
  • On the other hand, I realize that your actions or behaviours are habit forming and therefore life shaping. Example, while times are good for us we aim to live as frugally as possible so we may save. Which in turn has provided us with a situation in which, if we happened to lose our jobs tomorrow, it would take quite some time for us before we would end up on the street.
  • The biggest gift you can give yourself or your family is to be open minded and resourceful, no matter what your personal situation currently is. Example, we have a friend who has been underemployeed for almost 3 years and try as he might to look for a job, he cannot find anything. He has written up several different versions of his resume and he looks for jobs online and applies, he has been to employment agencies and talked to friends, but he has had no luck with finding a job. In the past 3 years John has found not 1 but 5 jobs and I have found 2. It’s not magic, we’re not anything special, so why can we do it? Well our friend is stuck on the fact that he is of supervisor level and he will not apply for any jobs he deems beneath him, but he will also not go out of his way to impress anyone to get the job. His closed mindedness and lack of resourcefulness have kept him underemployed.
  • My husband has this wonderfully simple saying he often repeats to me, which is “Give time, time.”. I have always been a very impatient person. I want everything yesterday or if not sooner. However John knows the value of patience, he knows that you cannot have everything you want at exactly the moment you think of it. Patience is a great gift. Example, 5 years ago I wanted what we have today so much that I felt like we were just not good enough because we didn’t already have it. It took us 5 years, but we have it and it is so much better than I ever imagined because we had to work so hard to get it and we appreciate even more for it.

So given that I got that much positive thinking out of a positively horrendous reality show, I’m thinking it was not all THAT bad after all 🙂


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Over a month ago it dawned on me that I never seemed to find the time to do much in the evenings during the week and even the weekends would fly by with very little accomplished. My hubby and I would barely have time to just talk with each other and it felt like anytime we had to do anything other than buying groceries on the weekend, that it just ate up all of our free time and by the time Monday rolled around, we felt like we barely had a weekend.

I was feeling lethergic and frustrated as life was just going at a too fast pace for both of us. We both work fultime outside the house in order to earn enough money to survive and save a little towards our future goals. However, it seemed we had so little quality time to enjoy. This started weighing heavily upon my mind, were we meant to go through the next 30 years like this; both of us working just to have what seemed like a few minutes of quality time each weekend together, then back to work?

Well, I started really thinking about this issue and realised that this was not a problem for everyone and realised that there must be something I’m not doing as well as I could. That there was something in my life that ate up all the free time me and my hubby had and then I realised. We’re both computer people. He likes to play games and watch the baseball online while I tend to spend alot of time reading up about the topic “du jour” online. We were doing this every evening and most of the weekend. It was amazing just how much of our time were dedicating to the computer. Especially damaging considering we both work 40 hours a week behind a computer.

Once I realised what the problem was, I had to find a way to start fixing the problem, after all it is not very easy to stop a habit 2 people have fallen into over a 4 year period. After some thought I came up with a plan and after discussing the idea with my hubby, we both agreed it would be worth a try. The plan was simply to have one evening a week where we did not spend more than half an hour on the computer and instead spent the evening doing something together. The challenge would be to come up something we would want to do together each week.

It worked, but we were wrong about one thing. After our first date night, we ended up having 2 full ate weeks before we returned to the computers. It was sooo much fun because we had forgotten how much we enjoyed just being around each other and talking, we just didn’t want to stop.

It’s amazing how taking just a small step in a new direction can lead to a totally new life, as now we often spend time together doing things which makes us feel as thought we have much more time than before. We’ve learned how to cook some new, healthier recipes and we’ve baked some delicious delights, we’ve taken up geo-caching as a new hobby and we’ve found some common dreams and goals which we are now using our new found time to achieve. I wish you all luck in rediscovering the time God has giving us to make the most of!


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So last week I was sick 2 Thursday and Friday from work during quiet a critical time at work. To be honest I’ve been feeling quiet depressed lately and I beliveve my despression is making me feel sick. I wish it would go away as I’ve suffered from depression in the past ad I no longer want that to be part of my life. It is hard to fight once it sets in.

The reason I have been getting depressed is that I have decided that I really want to move to the US, but there are so many things which need to be done before I can even start thinking about moving. I started reading into the process at the end of last year and slowly started collecting the required paperwork. I’m much closer now than I was 5 months ago, but the toughest part has not yet arrived, so I keep knocking away at sending away paperwork and trying to handle it one step at a time. Like they say – the easier way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time.

I guess something else contributing to my feeling that we have a stopwatch ticking down on this issue is that both my boyfriend’s and my employment contracts are coming up for renewal : his at the end of July and mine mid-way October. In this economy it is very hard to say if they’ll be renewed or not and I feel it’ll be the perfect opportunity for us to pack up and go. Even though we have not saved up nearly as much money as we dicussed we would and the paperwork will take several more months to process at least.

I’m feeling so unreasonably impatient on one hand and on the other I feel if we go earlier we’ll be putting some of our other dreams on hold longer. Like buying a hobby farm. Once we immigrate to the States, it’ll take us much longer to save up the money to have a decent deposit on a country house. I need to stop being so impatient and I need to stop worrying about EVERYTHING. After all that is the whole reason we’ve consciously decided to live a simpler life. So that we learn to enjoy the every day instead of killing ourselves working for an uncertain future.

Someone once told me a story I’ll never forget. This woman and her husband had 3 kids and they decided one day to save every penny they had so that one day they could afford to build a their dream house. This goal motivated them so much that they hardly ever brought anything extra for the family, they scrimped and saved so much that they cut out nearly all “wants” in their lives. They only spent money on “needs” and put all the remainder of their money into savings for their dream house. Then finally the day came around where they could afford to build their dream house and they did. When it was finished, they were so happy with it, theirs kids were over the moon. It was a dream come true. 1 week after it was comepleted and they had moved in, the house was burnt to the ground with all their possessions inside.

True story with so much meaning and is quite appropriate to heal my current mood. I will meditate upon the truth of this story.
So our online “high interest” savings account interest rate is dropping again from 3.75% to 3.5% as of May 20th. This makes it much less attractive to save our money in that account compared to our normal savings accounts as the difference in interest percentage is less than one full percent. We’ll keep our savings there for now, but I might have to start looking around for a better interest rate if it drops any further.

It’s a pity that we could not place our cash in CDs. We’re so shakey at the moment with the economy and our plans to move that I don’t want to tie up our money for any length of time. We need it as accessible as possible.

I hope you all keep well during the next few days, especially my friends who are facing a company reorganisation announcement on Monday.


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Seems like recently that the economic recession is the prevalent topic in the collective conciousness. Companies are announcing daily bad figures and layoffs, governments are concentrating on the increasing unemployment rates and putting together bailout packages and people are discussing their newly acquired war wounds. During all this commotion I find the only way I can keep myself calm and positive is to concentrate on my personal life and try to not let all this panic infect my thoughts.

I have therefore come up with a plan of action to help keep me from concentrating too much on the negative and to instead see this situation for what it is: part of the process of life.

1. Get enough sleep, eat well and exercise to keep myself feeling healthy because I handle things better if I am feeling

2. Be aware of the current situation, but do not ponder on it too much.

3. Work hard at my current job keeping in mind that it is not secure and there is nothing I can do about that. I am developing my network and concentrating some extra effort in growing my skillset.

4. I have updated my resume and am thinking about what sort of work I might want to do if I have to leave my job. Part of this is that I am doing occasional research online to see what type of jobs are avaliable in the current climate and which companies are hiring.

5. Keep adding to the emergency fund and finding ways to reduce our monthly bills.

6. Spend quality time with my loved ones doing things which do not cost alot of money but will provide good memories for years to come.

7. If I have to leave my job, I will dedicate at least 2-4 hours a day to a job search and the remaining 4-6 hours I will use to either do some volunteer work, start a small business or learn a new skill ( in other words I will do something constructive with that time). This will keep my involved in society, give me something positve to concentrate on and perhaps open up new doors.

8. Keeping dreaming about a bright future filled with love, health and happiness!

So there you have my action plan to survive the recession. I may add some things to this as I go along.

May God keep you all safe!


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One of the things I’ve have been horendous at doing is managing my own energy. I noticed this while I was obtaining my education, but the negative affects of it really hit me when I joined the workforce and moved in with my boyfriend. The fact that once you are outside your natural habitat 24/7 and are forced to deal with new situations and people, means that you can no longer rely on those rituals which replaced and replenished the energy you lost as easily.

I found myself in a situation where I could no longer shut myself of when I felt drained. I could not longer enjoy the energy generating activities I used to participate in whenever I wanted to do so. This lead me down a path of self destruction where stress and exhaustion was taking over my every thought. My sleep was distrupted and my life was in a downward spiral. It took several years for me to realise that the problem was not that I felt insecure in job, or that I needed trump that constant self comparisson(to whomever may have been prominent in my eyes at that particular time) or even that I was feeling uncertain about nearly every decision I made. Once I did figure out what was wrong I wish I could say it fixed everything overnight, like a light switch going on and solving all my problems. I cannot say that, but what I can say it it opened up a whole new realm of possibilities for me. It created a new facet to my life which is an ongoing opportunity for me to improve my situation.

What I realised was that I was the only one in control of how I managed my personal energy and that no one and nothing else was able to control that but me. I could keep just letting everything and everyone(including myself) take away my energy, or I could find ways to prevent it. I needed to find ways to prevent this from happening. At a point where I felt broken I realised that this was a basic life skill that I had never worked upon and which was an achilles heel to me. It was destroying my adult life and threaten to ruining me in the process.

All my life I had worked to be a product member of society, to try and fit in with a community with which I felt little connection and apparently which returned the sentiment. This realisation opened my eyes to the fact that I could not be anything unless I was me first. That I could not give anything unless I gave to myself first. In giving to myself I could then be strong enough to give to others.

So at this moment in my life, I have realised that I need to do away with any rituals or “addictions” which I feel I need to re-energise myself and instead focus on growing the true energy source, which is me. I have been giving myself energy and trying to amplify it so I may give the extras to others, instead of giving my only supply.

I am doing this by connecting with who I really am. By spending time with myself and meditating upon what I find important to me. I am still in the intial phase of finding out what is important to me but the process is surely the most enjoyable part. I plan in putting in energy into only things which truly matter to me and living in the moment.

Today I truly matter to me and am therefore putting my energy into me.

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“May you live in interesting times.”


The world is experiencing a very uncertain period, not just economically. There are natural disasters affecting more people than ever recorded, the weather is changing unpredictably, people have predicted the end is near and infact we have a date for the world to end, 21 December 2012. Amongst all this turmoil I am finding hope and I am seeking to send out positive energy into the world. It is exactly times like these when we as human beings can create magic, we can bring about great change and enjoy wonderous acts of generosity.


Generosity of spirit, mind and body. It is exactly in times such as these that I realise that money, status and things are not what makes life good. Instead it is the enjoyment of the simple things in life and the nuturing of relationships which is most fulfiling and enduring.


Today I want to add something to this world, today I want to send out positive energy into the universe and hope that my tiny voice gains momentum. I hope that my positive energy plants a seed here in our world which will grow and be amplified by other people’s positive energy and starts to warm the world and the universe.


I am greatful to be able to enjoy today, this moment, as this is the only thing I have. It is the only thing I will ever have and so I cheerish it for now and for always. In my moment of now I love each and everyone of my fellow human beings, now matter what you are experiecing in this moment of now. Whatever part of the process you are going through, what ever state of being you are experiencing I love you and send my warmth of my heart and soul to you.


If you have read this post and have been touch at all by my positive energy please leave a comment behind and share your positive energy with the world and the universe. May the postive energy you send out be returned to you a million times over.

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