Archive for the ‘stories to live by’ Category

I was flipping through the tv guide the other day when I came across the show Wife Swap. This is a reality show I tend to skip over as every time I have attempted to watch it the negative energy coming off of the screen just forces me to walk away, but I am not sure what captured my attention this particular time…maybe a word flashed that caught my imagination or maybe I was hallucinating, but I flicked to the info of the episode and found it really appealed to my state of mind. The description of the episode was something like:

“A well off lady who believes in the power of positive thinking and self manifestation swaps place with a down on her luck woman who’s husband is currently unemployed and whom lives in a trailer.”

Positive thinking – check

Self manifestation – check

This one sounded like it might be a really good watch. So I dedicated an hour of my life to see what it may reveal and how this wonderful positive thinking would greatly influence and hopefully help improve the outlook of the other lady’s family. Oh just how sadly wrong I was…..*cue the usual negativity that ensues in this program*

Of course, when the wives enter their “new homes” the husbands find it difficult to deal with the new women that they are living with and some quite amazing discussions and reactions ensue. There are so many thoughts and emotions I experienced while watching this program that I cannot explain them all, so I’m going to try and touch upon what I feel are the most important ones for me:

  • It is much easier to think positively about a situation when things are going well for you personally, it is much harder when you are personally going through tough times. Example, I find it a lot of fun to *try* and live as frugally as possible, but I have the luxury of knowing if it doesn’t work out I can spend more because the money is there. I *know* that if we had to be frugal simply because there was no other option, it would not feel like such a positive experience.
  • On the other hand, I realize that your actions or behaviours are habit forming and therefore life shaping. Example, while times are good for us we aim to live as frugally as possible so we may save. Which in turn has provided us with a situation in which, if we happened to lose our jobs tomorrow, it would take quite some time for us before we would end up on the street.
  • The biggest gift you can give yourself or your family is to be open minded and resourceful, no matter what your personal situation currently is. Example, we have a friend who has been underemployeed for almost 3 years and try as he might to look for a job, he cannot find anything. He has written up several different versions of his resume and he looks for jobs online and applies, he has been to employment agencies and talked to friends, but he has had no luck with finding a job. In the past 3 years John has found not 1 but 5 jobs and I have found 2. It’s not magic, we’re not anything special, so why can we do it? Well our friend is stuck on the fact that he is of supervisor level and he will not apply for any jobs he deems beneath him, but he will also not go out of his way to impress anyone to get the job. His closed mindedness and lack of resourcefulness have kept him underemployed.
  • My husband has this wonderfully simple saying he often repeats to me, which is “Give time, time.”. I have always been a very impatient person. I want everything yesterday or if not sooner. However John knows the value of patience, he knows that you cannot have everything you want at exactly the moment you think of it. Patience is a great gift. Example, 5 years ago I wanted what we have today so much that I felt like we were just not good enough because we didn’t already have it. It took us 5 years, but we have it and it is so much better than I ever imagined because we had to work so hard to get it and we appreciate even more for it.

So given that I got that much positive thinking out of a positively horrendous reality show, I’m thinking it was not all THAT bad after all 🙂


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